Tuesday, July 25, 2017

The Other Side of the Door

Greetings my fellow spooks. I must ask, is it too much to ask that people follow certain rules? Don't touch a hot stove. Look both ways before you cross. And don't open doors to the land of the dead. Well here is a movie that shows why some doors should stay locked, and the key destroyed, or launched into space.

In Mumbai India, after a tragic accident, Maria is consumed with grief as the accident claimed the life of her son Oliver. She is also overcome with guilt cause during the accident she chose to save her daughter Lucy first before Oliver leaving him to die. After surviving an attempted suicide, her housekeeper, Piki, tells her of a temple where the line between the living and the dead is thin and there, Maria can say one last goodbye to Oliver. Piki give's her instructions. One instruction is that Maria is to never open the door no matter how much Oliver pleads with her. Sure enough, at the temple, Oliver shows up and Maria speaks to him. However, he tells her he has to go. Not wanting him to leave, Maria opens the door and finds he is not there. Unknown to her, she has disturbed the balance between the living and the dead, and what has come home with her is not the sweet boy she remembers, but a dark version of Oliver.

This movie had some potential, that was drowned out by missing information. There are numerous examples. One being the Shamans that seem to pop up everywhere. We are given a short but informal fact about them. BUT, we are not given information as to why they are doing various things. One scene is that they approach Maria and put ash on her face. There is no explanation for it. No reason. Just, 'here is some ash on your face. Have a nice day'. I would of loved to hear a reason for that. Or how about what they are chanting? Or why is every plant dying? As you watch the movie it starts to make sense, but a little bit of fill in the gaps would be nice. Plus, this movie is basing the haunting on the Hindu beliefs. We get such a small taste of it, that we are left in the dark. And some things are just never explained.

I got mixed feelings about this movie. On one hand its just your average scares and story of ghosts. But on the other hand, with the culture twist added, it makes it more interesting. True it borrows some familiar ghost story layouts, but on a small level, it works. Aside from that, I wouldn't say don't watch this movie, but I wouldn't say you have got to watch this. Much like the character Oliver, its in limbo. As for the whole door thing, I wouldn't open the door even if the spirit said it had pizza. What spirit? Its a large pepperoni with cheesy stuff crust? And a nice cold soda? And you have choloate cake??? Come on in! Oh crap....

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

We are still here

Children of the night, prepare yourselves for a tale of tragedy, revenge, and ghosts that look like a well done steak. I give you We are still here.

In 1979 Ann and Paul, who have lost their son has moved to a new small town in order to start anew. Once moved in, they begin to have strange occurrences. Pictures breaking, balls bouncing down the stairs. The usual timid start to show that there are spooks in the house. Ann believes its their son Bobby's spirit. Paul, being a skeptic, shrugs it off, believing its just Ann's imagination fueled by her grief. Of course things escalate fast when a repair man is maimed by an apparition. Ann decides to invite her friends May and Jacob, in the hopes that May, who is also a medium, can help get in contact with Bobby's spirit. Soon the small group learns about the truth of their new home, the town, and that the spirits that reside there, are out for blood thirsty revenge.

This movie was just right. I mean sure there were some things that got me a little, befuddled. Example; some of the establishing shots were really long. I mean, ten seconds long. But aside from that, it was good. They didn't take long to get to the spooks, and the suspense before the ghosts did their jump scare was exceptional. Heck, there were times that I was bracing myself for that jump scare. Plus the twist was decent. It was nothing really new. But the story itself was what made it a success.

This is one I would recommend. Its got a good plot, some interesting characters, and the burnt ghosts are nice and crispy...I mean creepy. Like a charbroiled steak...medium rare...with cursed potato salad...now I'm hungry.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017


Hey my fellow dark dwellers. Ever saw a movie and thought; it may not be a full blown horror, but it may be a good thriller. I mean come on. Its full of old runes, ancient sacrifices, and an island full of conspiracy. Sounds great right? It would of been if it didn't seem so boring. Let's check out the movie, Sacrifice.

The movie opens with a doctor named Tora Hamilton. During a consultation with a woman about to give birth, Tora is reveled to be pregnant herself as we witness her having a miscarriage. A few months later her and her husband Duncan, go to the Shelton Islands, Duncan's old home. There they hope to adopt a child. During the 12 month wait, Tora discovers in their backyard, the body of a young woman who had given birth but has had her heart cut out and ancient runes carved into her body. She is then told that the body is of a woman who died hundreds of years ago and is what is known as a 'bog' body. However, Tora suspects otherwise and begins to conduct her own investigation. What she finds is a secret, ancient cult full of blood sacrifice.

Now that may all sound like the premise for a good thriller. And you maybe right. However, in this movies case, no. You are subject to ultimate boredom and also the question...why is this chick so freaking into this mystery? If I was told by people who are experts, that this is just an old, well preserved body, I would just say, 'cool', and leave things alone. But she takes an obsessive turn. I get that even in her own house there are these old runes that seem fresh carved into the building and such that are near the same as the ones that the body had, plus she is a doctor and knows a thing or two about bodies. But, I still can't really see the reason for her to really suspect anything other than she's bored. A lot of this movie is centered around her trying to identify the true origins of the body. And it just leaves you screaming, 'get to something interesting!' Its almost 45 minutes to the movies ending that anything interesting happens. Everything takes way to long. And your brain goes numb.

Even though there are some interesting bits, there is just not enough. I have to condemn this movie. It dull, it makes it hard to get into. And the things you want to learn more about or see, you don't. Check it out if you want. What am I your mother? I hope not. Last thing I need is to be sacrificed. What? I go through all that and instead of a baby shower I get a ritual sacrifice? Oh hell no!

Thursday, June 8, 2017


Hey spooklings. When you are watching that one doomsday movie that involves demons, you want to see the demons right? Well, get ready to barely see some demons with the magic of mockumentary done through not just any camera lens, but the camera lens from those freaking Google glasses. Introduced in this movie, JeruZalem.

This movie starts out with an old home movie where two priests are in Jerusalem to investigate a woman who had died three days ago but had come back from the dead, only she has become hostile and demonic. Fast forward to the present where the main character Sarah and her friend Rachel are going on vacation to Tel Aviv. Partly so that Sarah can recover from the loss of her brother. On the plane, they meet young archaeologist student Kevin, who is interested in things like religious mythology. He talks the two girls into joining him in Jerusalem for Yom Kippur. There they meet Omar at the hostel that they stay at and enjoy some partying. However their fun is cut short when the gates of hell open up releasing an army of winged demons set on unleashing their fury on all the world. All this recorded on Sarah's handy dandy Google glasses.

This movie, while an idea with promise, has some issues. The biggest of them all being...its a freaking mockumentary! And not only is it a mockumentary, its a mockumentary done with Google glasses! So you get the glory of seeing things like, text messages, facebook look ups when it recognizes someone, Google maps for when they are lost, and the glasses malfunctioning. All this distracting the audience from the story and what is actually going on. And if that isn't enough, it takes 48 minutes which is near half of the movie to get to any real action. We get to go on the adventures of bars and going through the city, with nothing interesting happening. And when the demons show up, we hardly get to see them. That shaky Google glasses just doesn't focus long enough. I don't think so personally. Plus, there is a gigantic demon terrorizing the streets and we have no idea who it is. Is is Satan? The golem that was mentioned earlier in the movie? Is it just a big demon? What is it?? And why don't you hold your head still enough so I can see it??!!! I wanna see the big scary demon monster! Also, why is her brother dead? Was there an accident? Did he die of cancer? Fill in the blanks people. Don't do these back stories and character development and leave out information! Yeesh. There is more, but I'm gonna stop while I'm ahead.

I put this in limbo because even though the POV camera work in this doesn't help the story in any way (at least I don't think), and your left with more questions about everything, its a neat concept. We have seen many different world end movies, very few involving religious influence, And to have the world fall under judgement through these zombie like demons is decent. If you've seen the REC movies, its got some religious influence, but at least with those movies they have a great story line and you can actually see the evil zombies, even with the camera shake going. I think if this movie was to of been done with the traditional style camera work, more history and information on these things, and less time focused on party times, it would of made a decent movie. Its not the worse but not the greatest. Its one of those, 'lets just watch something. I don't care, I'm not gonna be focused on it anyways', movies. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna ask that big demon thing some questions. Hey Mr.Big Demon! Can I have a moment of your time?...hey don't you walk away from me. I'm talking to you! I will bite your ankle you over grown gargoyle!

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Lights Out

Hello my fellow spooklings. Are you afraid of the dark? Well, you should be! After seeing this movie, you will want the night light, the glow worm, screw it! Just get into that tanning booth. You'll look like a old baseball glove but at least you'll be safe! Lets check out why in the movie, Lights Out.

After the death of her husband, Sophie, who has a sever form of depression is discovered by her son to be talking to an imaginary friend named Diana, who can only be seen in the dark. Sophie's son, Martin, is frightened by Diana and because of this he cannot sleep. After falling asleep in class, his school contacts his half-sister, Rebecca, to come and get him when his mother doesn't answer their call. Rebecca takes Martin to her place so he can get some sleep and be safe. While there, Rebecca is nearly attacked by Diana in her own apartment, showing that the specter is real and dangerous. Soon Rebecca learns the truth about who Diana is and in that truth learns that everyone, including her mother, is in real life threatening danger.

I admit, this was not a bad movie. Seriously, if you were freaked out at first by dark rooms at night, this movie will make you think that the figure you may have seen in the corner, is actually there. The scares were good with the whole lights being turned on and off. Really building anticipation. Especially when they are toggling the lights on and off you are nearly screaming at the t.v. 'keep the freak'n light on!' It works pretty well. But of course not all movies are perfect...

One pet peeve I had while watching this was that when they are telling the story of Diana, you are more intrigued by that story, than the main story. At least I was. I had so many questions that there is no answer to. Unless they do a prequel. Also with Rebecca's father, not to give much away, when you learn of his fate you are very confused. Lets just leave it at that.

Other than some usual things, Lights Out is not that bad. I do recommend it. I wouldn't own it, cause the lights on/off thing gets old, but you should at least see it once. And, and, it was actually based off of an original short film from 2013. I saw it, and it was really creepy, especially at the end. Oh, I was freaked out at the end. More so than the big movie. So if you see this movie, check out the short film first if ya can and judge for yourself. As for me, I'm gonna shut off all the lights that are not needed right now. Cause you know whats scarier than a ghost afraid of the dark? The electric bill! AAAHHHH!!!!

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Ava's Possesions

Welcome back fellow creatures. Ever wonder what happens AFTER the possession? We all know that song and dance. Person becomes possessed, priest comes in, we see split pea soup, and things go back to normal. But then what? Well, the answer to that is in this movie, Ava's Possessions.

We first see the main character, Ava, being exorcised. After the demon is expelled, she gets up the next day to find her family cleaning up her apartment that is very trashed. Not only that, her parents look like they had been beaten up. Ava has a hard time believing what had happened since she has no memory of any of the events that took place. She is shown video of her attacking a stranger by her lawyer, and is told that she is facing jail time unless she goes to either a type of mental facility, or attend a meeting for the recently possessed. She chooses to attend the meetings and learns that some of the steps are apologizing for the chaos that she caused to individual people. Also since she has no memory, she is to figure out everything that she had done while possessed. During her discovery she finds that she did some real damage as she has lost friends and even her job. The deeper she goes, the more disturbing and dangerous her discoveries become.

This movie was actually really good. I mean lets face it, we have all seen the 'what happens during possession', but afterwards, no. Not a thing. Ok, some would argue that we see it with the Exorcist 2 movie and what not, but I'm not counting that so forget it. This movie is more of a dark comedy. No, your not laughing your chesticles off as you watch this. Its just not as dark as you would think. Its not scary, but it is kind of a thriller mystery. You want to figure out what this girl did while under the demons control. You want to know why she was possessed, and you keep guessing as the movie progresses. Its like a fun puzzle. But with memory loss and demons from the seventh circle of hell.

I recommend this movie. Aside from some dark points, its really fun. Its a good movie to have a friend or two over to watch. Have a drink or two as you watch the mystery unfold. At least if you drink you only have memory loss for just that night. Then you use the power of holy coffee to help exorcise the hangover demon.

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Sinister 2

Welcome back my black hearted lovely's. And what little flick have we got to review? How about the sequel to a pretty decent horror film? I'm talking about that sequel known only as Sinister 2. Time for spooky ghost children and the boogie man to team up again. In the most boring way possible...

We are reintroduced to the homicidal tendencies of the children whose souls now belong to the evil Bughuul. A young boy named Dylan seems to be having bad dreams because of the evil creature. Meaning he may be the next one selected to kill his family. The deputy from the first movie, is investigating the murders of the Oswalt family and other families who have suffered the same fate. Dylan and his family, mom named Courtney, and twin brother, Zach, had moved into an old farmhouse to get away from his abusive father. Visited by the ghosts of the other children who had killed their family, Dylan is told to watch the films they made of them killing their families. The deputy shows up because the house that the family are in right now has a church right next to it that was the scene of a grotesque murder that was similar to that of the Oswalt's and families before that. Knowing that the family is in danger, the deputy must find a way to break the cycle before the family becomes the latest sacrifice to Buguul.

I have one word for this movie...bored, bored, bored, bored! Unlike the first one, I was not on the edge of my seat. In fact, I was laying down on my couch trying to stay awake. Yes, its interesting cause it follows the kids process as to how they become seduced into serving Buguul, but at the same time its, not interesting. You get a decent idea I suppose of how this creature chooses their next servant, and you see what the kid goes through, but aside from that, the side plots just don't hold your interest. With the deputy going around trying to figure out the connection between the murders and how to stop the evil monster, that was interesting but not discussed much in detail. And the polar opposites of the brothers, one being meek the other aggressive, adds a bit of a, 'ah, so that's why boogie man chose him'. It adds to everything, but you just don't care. With the other movie you get a nice creep factor going and your glued to the screen. With this one, your waiting for something interesting to happen. And it doesn't until the end. Even then your left going, WTF??

So for final observation, not gripping, not scary. The only time you even get a bit of twisted goodness is when you learn how these kids killed their families. I don't really recommend this sequel. In fact, stick with the first one. You get more from it. With this one, you get the urge to take a nap. If you want to see it, see it. You may like it, I don't know. Now if you'll excuse me, Mr. Boogie asked me to babysit while he goes and blows off some steam at a local bar. Come here kids, lets watch a scary movie. How about 'Sex in the city'?... Stop screaming!!!